I Ain’t No Eyepochondriac!

Please bear with me today.  I am afraid, and I have discovered that writing out my fear works well for me.  Since I’ve sworn to chronicle this journey (do I sound like Frodo?), I’m writing it here. 


Two weeks ago, I was driving down the highway when my vision was flooded with teeny bubbles.  I recognized them as floaters, those little transparent shapes that move as you look around, making it impossible for you to get them into focus.  The difference was that these appeared suddenly and there were dozens, maybe hundreds of them.  By a skilled self-exam (close one eye, then the other) I determined them to be from my right eye.  They didn’t obscure my vision, but were definitely a distraction.  I had to concentrate on looking through them to the highway.  Later that day I called my opthalmologist to ask a question.  His receptionist, rather than letting me speak to him, asked about my symptoms and scheduled an appointment for two mornings away. 


That was my first mistake, being put off by the receptionist.  Clearly my doc had instructed her that some symptoms require urgent appointments, and that there’s no use in talking about it.  But his first mistake had been giving me a bit of wry, amused response at my symptoms on two previous occasions.  I have not forgotten that he left me feeling like an eyepochondriac.  (Yes, it’s my word!  fear makes me funny.)


Just so happens that my appointment fell on a day that I had no morning electricity, so I skipped the 8:30 all-the-way-across-town appointment.  I was called out of town to the daughter after that, and like all good (and guilty) mothers, I put my own symptoms on the back burner.  Yeah, that was mistake number two.  Yesterday I began to notice my symptoms indoors, and it seemed that the bubbles had increased in number.  I can see them now as I look at my computer screen.  I googled “eye floaters” and discovered that they can be a symptom of retinal detachment.  Of course retinal detachment can be related to inflammation.  Of course lupus is the disease of big inflammation anywhere in your body.  Whoopee.  Big fear.  Really big fear.


I’ve called the opthalmologist’s office, and I’m to make the cross-town trek for an 8:30 appointment tomorrow.  I’ll have to get up before God, eat breakfast, take meds, bathe and dress and drive in rush hour traffic.  Hopefully I’ll be so busy that I won’t notice the butterflies in my stomach as I drive.  For once I want Steve (let’s call him Steve, ’cause that’s his name) to give me that wry explanation of how using my dry eyes drops more frequently can prevent…blah, blah, blah.  I don’t even want to think of the alternative.


It gives me pause to think that I might be about to complete the big trifecta of undateability:  blind, crippled and crazy.


Okay, enough of that.  On to the important stuff.  I’ve got new yarn from Lion Brand, ordered even though I am on yarn prohibition.  I had to investigate their new Recycled Cotton (74% recycled cotton/24% acrylic/2% other) and LB Collection Cashmere (100% cashmere DK weight).  The recycled cotton is currently on my needles forming a cozy baby hat.  I love the heathered colours, and it handles nicely.  Nice crisp stitches.  The cashmere was an excellent price, $14 for 25 grams, (usually $25 or more for that weight), and feels wonderfully soft.  We’ll see how it knits. 


One announcement before I close:  Will the readers who have all-seeing powers and can scrutinize my messy house please look for my missing camera.  I mislaid it Monday and I really need those product photos.




One Response

  1. It’s a shame you can’t push a button and make the missing (hiding?) camera beep so you can find it. Shame on it!

    Take care on your cross-town drive tomorrow. And be sure to let us know what Dr. Steve tells you.

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