I’m Back, in More Ways Than One

Two days ago I decided to throw in the towel and return to my old antidepressant.  I made the switch in hopes of getting some favorable metabolic support (losing weight, okay?).  If you’ve been hanging in there with me you will remember how bad the withdrawal was-remember Medication Side Effects… (https://essiewb.wordpress.com/wp-admin/post.php?action=edit&post=224 )?  I began another antidepressant medication simultaneously with tapering the old one.  I knew it would take some time for the new drug to be effective, but after more than a month my depression symptoms were coming back rapidly.  The new drug just wouldn’t hold me.  Twenty years of treatment for a very chemical (serotonin-related) major depression have taught me not to play with this.  The symptoms reached my critical point and I restarted the old drug.  Scraping my mood out of a Black Hole is important to me.  It has kicked in already, and I am back to normal. 


Sometimes medications have side effects that are actually helpful.  One of the side effects of this particular medication is that it helps to decrease our perception of certain kinds of pain.  A few days ago, I complained about moving into a more painful stage with my disease.  I don’t think it was more pain-I just felt more pain once I was off that particular med.  It’s pain relief is an advantage I didn’t value enough until I was off of it.  Now I realize that the drug is doing double duty, and worth every penny for that. 


When I was practicing medicine, this trial-and-error, see how an individual reacts to a medication was an approach I frequently had to take.  It may be daunting to lay people to see how much of that is required to achieve the desired result without undue side effects.  I enjoyed the tinkering.  It was what I was there for, doing internal medicine instead of surgery, treating diseases with lifestyle changes and medications, instead of doing those permanent pruning procedures. 


Enough of that!  I had a great day.  I was back at knitting group, and happy to see all the fabulous people in the group.  This afternoon, after group, my sister (one of the many) called and was telling me about the joyous reception she received when she returned to church after missing two Sundays.  She related how good that made her feel.  I had to laugh, because I think I felt the same way about returning to knitting group.  Not sure how she took that comparison.  She may be praying for my soul right now, especially since she knows I’m between churches. 


While at knitting group I finished the dusty rose Cashsilk hat.  Well, I finished the knitting.  Gotta pull piece of yarn through the last few stitches and close up the top, and weave in my ends.  It turned out just like I envisioned.  I’ll photograph and post it soon.  Meanwhile, I think it’s time for a bit of a break. 




5 Responses

  1. Glad to hear that the new (old) med is working in multiple directions. Meds are so individual – and it’s hard to convince folks of that sometimes.

    I waved as I drove past your assembly place this morning. We were working at “our” assembly place, working toward opening day for our new gallery. I’ll be sure to let you know when it happens.

  2. I had a great time today; I hope you codify your hat for others to follow the pattern.

  3. So good to hear that you are well.

  4. Thank you so much for visiting my blog….and don’t you worry girlfriend. I’ve got plans to send you off some yarn when it’s done. I would be so honored to see something made by someone with your talents and passion for yarn.
    Upon my girlfriend’s request I have a kinder, gentler blog although not as engaging. I have been on a medical leave all week and have not posted that either because I don’t want to worry Simon while he’s at his competition. They have isolated it to an adrenal crisis of some sort. It sure has been nice to be at home spinning, taking care of the goats and de-stressing.

  5. You made such a sweet comment on my blog about my relationship with my ex sister-in-law. Our relationship was one of the casualties of my divorce. My ex was from Iran and those family dynamics are, let’s say different to be kind. She hasn’t been “allowed” to talk to me. Very sad for both of us. She begged her husband to lift the restriction and he did…but maybe only for that day….I’m not sure….and that’s why there were such bittersweet moments at the wedding and both she and I shared tears on what should have been nothing but a beautiful day.

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